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> [FANFIC] A New Legend, My first story.
jusputitonmytab
Posted: Jan 31 2013, 06:32 PM


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Very good read. I really enjoyed it! Can't wait to see more.
Takahashi Rensuke
Posted: Feb 1 2013, 04:37 AM


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QUOTE (Meteor @ Yesterday, 10:45 AM)
QUOTE (Takahashi Rensuke)
Are the double "had"s intentional? I can't tell...

And yeah, those are likely intentional, because they're actually correct in UK English.

Hmm, I thought it was kind of weird at first, but it does makes some sense too...
Saxifrage
  Posted: Feb 4 2013, 06:11 AM


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That's what my teacher(s) taught me lol. Tenses exercises. Makes you remember them.
Meteor, I'll add some of the FD race into Chapter 3 while posting up Chapter 4.
I have actually written up a bonus chapter (part 1) about Kengo's past and I think I might want to continue that. The inspiration just came in on my birthday lol. I guess I'll include the bonus chapters every now and then.

I need a day without homework or tests to be able to write. Definitely not during the holidays though.

Happy Chinese New Year everyone! awesome.gif
Saxifrage
  Posted: Jan 10 2018, 08:25 AM


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Gonna be a double post to revive this.

Hey guys, it's been quite a while, almost 5 years. I was busy with school and life but I'm finally a bit free now. I was going through my stuff, and found my old notebook with drafts of this fanfic, I thought I'd come back and give it another look, and got myself to raise the pen, to try and at least finish it, hopefully. shrug.gif

My writing has changed significantly, I think, the difference will be quite big, but here it is.

Chapter 5 - Uphill Battle

The first hairpin quickly approached. Keisuke felt the pressure amping up, the Levin hot on his heels before they had even cleared a corner.

Such acceleration.

Keisuke slowed down and sent his FD drifting into the hairpin. A sense of déjà vu hit Keisuke as he was counter-steering, for he could clearly see the Levin drifting right beside him, taking the same line. A blurry image formed in his mind, Keisuke remembered his first encounter with Fujiwara. A ghost. That was what he had thought at first. He lost to a ghost at Akina. Perhaps he was just too prideful to admit that he had indeed lost; for he had witnessed, with lucidity, the silhouette of the breathing Trueno, in its inertia drift. It felt very much alive. An artisan who had melded with his creation; that was why the drift looked stunning, shocked him into spinning. He never forgot the anguish, but he remembered, too, the small sense of admiration he had felt.

In the face of defeat, there is much you learn. Keisuke realised that he grew complacent, arrogant, even conceited, after he was coined 2nd of Red Suns. The many feelings he experienced losing, including when his brother picked Fujiwara for the race against the professional, served to make him more mature. Surely, he was better a person and more skillful a driver now.

The thoughts passed through at the back of his head. They had already reached the second section, the Levin not so far behind. The series of slight, small turns gave Keisuke an advantage as the FD breezed through it easily. The power difference was evident. A series of hairpins was coming up. Keisuke understood that his opponent would likely try his chance there, one of the few small-speed sectors on this course.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kengo intended to use the first wide hairpin as a means to catch up. Opting for the late-apex line, he braked slightly; first he went wide, then he clipped the late-apex on the exit. The tremendous exit speed allowed him to gain on the FD. He wasted no time shifting gears : the clutch, the gearbox, and his hand was back on the steering.

Not quite enough.

A fierce braking competition ensued as they entered the next right hairpin; second gear, heel-and-toe, and the tachometer needle hit 6000, the Levin’s engine roared as it drifted alongside the FD. They exited the corner side by side, moving onwards to the next hairpin.

I may have caught up, but it’s hard to give chase, let alone attempt an overtake.

The low-speed section was over. The FD was fast on straights, but it wasn’t exactly slow in corners, too. The Mazda rotary-powered cars, known for their agility; it was only then that Kengo finally saw reality for himself. It was fast, fast through corners, fast out of corners, and of course, insanely fast on straights. Kengo stepped on it as they raced through the arc-like corner. A sharp left approached next. His foot lifted off the throttle, his hands turned the wheel, and the car changed motion. Right foot on the brakes next, he depressed the clutch, twisted his right leg and gave the throttle a small blip. He let go of the clutch, and controlled tire traction with his throttle management. He was perspiring, concentrating hard, careful not to make any mistakes. Kengo almost floored the gas as they exited the corner, entering the third section. Never had he pushed the Levin this hard. He was starting to feel sorry for his own car.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Keisuke was in form. He could make the car turn, speed, and slow down almost at will. Having reminisced his moment of fateful encounter, a strong determination welled up inside him. He would not see another AE86’s taillights on a touge that night. He would not allow it. He had expected the Levin to make its move back at the low-speed section, but surprisingly, there were no bold or sudden maneuvers.

Could still be up to something.

Regardless, he wasn’t feeling safe. That glow from behind threatened him like a predator on the hunt, seemingly following the FD’s ‘blood’ trail.

Section three is high-speed focused, with comparatively long straights. Keisuke did not go easy on the throttle, but he was careful, almost meticulous with it during the hairpins and minor corners. Instead of pushing the gas right on the entry to force a drift, Keisuke instead used weight-shift from braking for sliding. He would only do a full throttle upon exit after the tires have regained traction. An improvement from his former self of reckless, aggressive throttle usage. Knowing the full merits of his car’s high power, Keisuke made use of high exit speeds to pull away at straights. Yet, the Levin was still closing in on the corners.

Remarkable skill, and a well-modified car.

Keisuke acknowledged his opponent’s strength, though he felt the race was albeit unfair, due to the fact that it was, after all, an uphill battle. Power did matter, by nature.

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The two cars sprinted into the 4th section, the gap widening and closing, widening and closing. It was almost like an endless loop. Kengo knew he had to break the rhythm, somehow. The three hairpins were gone.

Not much chances left.

The final two turns: a right, then a left. Kengo’s eyes narrowed, forming a tunnel vision, completely focused on the road and the yellow Mazda. They gleamed, as Kengo prepared his attack.

This post has been edited by Nicholas86 on Jan 10 2018, 08:26 AM
Meteor
Posted: Jan 19 2018, 01:48 AM


Were you expecting something else?
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Wow, was starting to think you wouldn't come back here. Welcome back to IDW Nicholas86. The fic section is a little dead right now with everyone being busy irl, so you won't get quite as much feedback as usual, but don't let that discourage you from writing if you're still enjoying doing so.
And yes, your writing has definitely seen an immense change. There were still some minor tensing issues later in this new chapter, but the prose is much more refined, and gets the feel of the race across with the much more impact. The only thing I have to suggest is that the chapters could be longer and have more happening in them, because so far nothing has happened in the story besides Kengo racing Takumi and Kengo racing Keisuke. But the way things are going so far is still fun to read, so great job on that front.
If you're planning to keep going, then bring on the next chapter.

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