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> [FANFIC] Carbon Expressway - Epilogue, A Rift in Time
HashiriyaR32
Posted: Mar 17 2010, 06:19 AM


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Call me crazy, but a car possessed by some little girl is way more interesting. Then again, I think we all have a possessed car story or two to relate to on that one?

That's something we could use MORE of.
Hannah
Posted: Mar 18 2010, 12:51 PM


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*shriek* WOW!! This one really hit the spot! I love mystery as much as I love action in racing! I'm glad you decided to mix things up a bit, it's pulled me back in. biggrin.gif biggrin.gif

I love mystery and drama novels. biggrin.gif Keep at it, Drifter! <3
kyonpalm
Posted: Mar 20 2010, 01:17 AM


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Absolutely and completely seamless!
You picked it up like the last chapter was yesterday! Nicely done! Great read.
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Rudy
  Posted: Sep 21 2013, 06:43 PM


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This post has been edited by Dorifuta on Sep 28 2013, 10:44 PM
Hannah
Posted: Sep 21 2013, 07:38 PM


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Once again, well written to say the least. I enjoyed the multiple perspective.

SPOILER
HashiriyaR32
Posted: Sep 22 2013, 04:05 PM


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There's only one option.

CONTINUE!
OkamiWind
Posted: Sep 27 2013, 01:49 PM


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Love this fic; dark at times with dramatic moments. Beautifully dark and well made.

Needs a conclusion where it is either bittersweet or good, not this...I dunno...bad taste I got from it. But that's just me.
kyonpalm
Posted: Sep 28 2013, 06:02 PM


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Chiming in at the request of the author.

SPOILER

I'm not given any good options, really, because there's no "redo", but if I have to pick between the two, I'd say continue. If I said "stop" and this was the final chapter, it would be a pretty anticlimactic one, so the best option is to give it a proper conclusion. Even if I don't like it.
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Nomake Wan
Posted: Sep 28 2013, 10:30 PM


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I...really don't remember where this story was going or anything, to be honest. But I was asked to read it, and I did... so here we go...

SPOILER

If you've got something written up, feel free to keep going... but personally I'm just confused. That's what happens when there's that huge a gap between chapters I guess.

This post has been edited by Nomake Wan on Sep 28 2013, 10:38 PM
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Rudy
  Posted: Sep 28 2013, 10:56 PM


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This post has been edited by Dorifuta on Oct 1 2013, 06:11 PM
OkamiWind
Posted: Sep 28 2013, 11:54 PM


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Well...supernatural but very nice indeed. It was a bit bittersweet but I felt a sense of resolution in this ending then the other one. I like it...I like it a lot.

Good alternate ending if I may say so myself.
Hannah
Posted: Sep 29 2013, 01:49 PM


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Brb crying like a bitch

The epilogue is great, it's the perfect ending to this story. The story as a whole was one amazing ride, I enjoyed it the whole way through. As for the epilogue, it was great, and it leads to us wanting more. Let's get cracking on those other stories, we love being entertained biggrin.gif

This post has been edited by Hibiscus on Sep 29 2013, 05:15 PM
wing_0
Posted: Oct 2 2013, 10:12 AM


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Didn't see that one coming. Great epilogue and a really cool twist biggrin.gif
kyonpalm
Posted: Oct 10 2013, 06:43 PM


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That was interesting. Don't really have much else to say, but I guess I'm satisfied. Probably the most you could ask for, really.
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PWNatorPWNED
Posted: Oct 10 2013, 09:12 PM


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Just read the whole fic right now. Nice, I like how you used Initial D and Tokyo Drift characters.
Meteor
Posted: Oct 19 2013, 01:04 AM


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Done reading this whole fic from start to finish. Sorry for being so late with the review.

(How do I type this as quickly as possible so I can get this review done before I have to go out of town again?)

Well, I can tell you that your prose is still pretty damn good. These last two chapters weren't boring. Character interactions were good as always, the writing made for a nice read, the chase scene didn't fail at being exciting, and this overall wasn't too bad an ending to the fic.
It did feel a little too sudden though, but at least the last chapter allows for the possibility of a continuation. That'll keep things in this story from just staying unresolved.
As for things to criticize, I have to admit the truck "accidentally" going the wrong way on the C1 came across as just a little too convenient. And I guess what N1 said regarding road names and firearms too. American police code being used by Japanese officers in Tokyo was also a little odd, but I guess those scenes just wouldn't have looked right without some sort of police code being used, so maybe it was just unavoidable considering none of us here could possibly be expected to know Japanese police code.
The representation of Karie's accent was also hilariously overdone; I just couldn't take it seriously. You could've really just written that bit of dialogue like normal and just let the reader's imagination fill in the gaps, since you already described the accent she had beforehand. It'd have honestly worked just fine that way.

Also, that bonus scene was just pointless.

So, anyway, maybe this fic could've gone on longer, but it ended decently and it'll tie into other stories nicely. Keep up the good work. Sorry I couldn't go more in-depth.

(Status in the list updated, btw.)

I'll try to edit this review to be more in-depth later if possible. Sorry again for taking so long, and sorry to everyone else waiting for me to review their stuff.

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